Last year I wrote about my experience as a WAHM (work at home mom)…the good, the bad, the awkward. At the time, I could not imagine NOT working from home. I had waited most of my career to get to a place where that benefit would be an option for me. No commute, more time with my kids, more freedom.
Until that benefit didn’t seem like a benefit anymore. The line between work life and home life was becoming more and more blurred. While working, I harbored stress from things that were happening outside my office door. When it was time to “go home”, I carried my work stress with me, immediately switching into mom mode with no time to decompress from a long day. I felt as though I was constantly pulled in two different directions. When things would come up during the work day, I felt it was on me to manage because though theoretically I wasn’t “home”, physically I was there and that made me look more available than my husband who was at work 40 miles away.
If I had a stressful day of work, there was no option to leave the stress at the door. My office is on the main floor of the house and by no fault of my employer, it was too easy to feel pulled to answer one more email or try to correct an issue in hopes of making the following day a little easier. I also started to feel pretty isolated. Modern technology affords a lot of options for connecting with people but I was genuinely missing face to face interaction with my clients and coworkers. My husband felt the impact of this. My kids felt the impact of this. And I definitely felt the impact of this.
So I made the hard choice to pursue another professional opportunity all the while hearing how crazy I was to give up the work at home life. I wasn’t just going to leave for any opportunity…I knew it had to be THE opportunity. A company I could grow with and a role that made the idea of wearing real clothes and makeup on a daily basis seem okay. And when that opportunity came it was both exciting and terrifying. I had been with my company for so long and knew my job so well. I also had strong memories of the chaos of my former office life trying to balance being a mom/wife/employee while being away from home for 10-12 hours a day. I kept repeating to myself, “growth is in the uncomfortable – you can do this!” And so I enthusiastically accepted the job I was offered and started preparing for this major life shift.
First, what about the kids? They have always had alternate caregivers while I was working, but being home meant flexibility to have the 4 year old nap while our nanny picked up the big kids from school or for a sick kid to sleep on the couch in my office as needed. And with my new hours (6am-2pm) and a commute into Phoenix, how would we make this all work? But like all things in life, we figured it out. And though the kids weren’t initially happy about mommy going back into work (mom guilt…ahhhhhh) they have adapted and are excited to come visit me at the office.
Second, what do people wear in an office anymore?!? I am fortunate to now work in a very casual atmosphere where you can basically wear what you want but for the past 4 years working from home, I didn’t put pants on most days and I figured that was not the kind of casual they were endorsing. I had a closet full of Ann Taylor Loft from my corporate office days that would make me look stuffy in this new setting but then a dresser full of Lululemon that I didn’t think would put my best foot forward. So I shopped…jeans, sweaters, boots. I spent 3 weeks debating what to wear that first day and I am happy to report I believe I found a good balance of casual, cool mom and professional, ambitious employee.
Other considerations that permeated my thoughts throughout this transition…could I bring a lunch? Can I listen to music? Will I adapt to new systems and processes quickly? How will I maintain a regular workout schedule? When will I have time to grocery shop? Will I make friends in the office? I could continue this list for pages…but you know what? Somehow I’m working through it all. I got a new lunch bag and bring my lunch everyday. I listen to music when I want. I am adapting…I am definitely riding the continuum of feeling like I am finally contributing in my role and then immediately feeling like such a drain on all of our team resources. But that is what being new is all about!
I have learned about the magical world of ordering groceries online and having my husband pick them up. I still workout 6 days a week (give or take) and though I miss those 9am classes my work at home job allowed me to attend, 4pm is great too. And I have wonderful coworkers. Diverse, smart, fun, and so very generous with their time. I absolutely love the culture of my new company and I am happy at work again. And if you’re going to be doing anything for 40+ hours a week, it should bring you happiness no matter what other benefits it affords you.
I feel very lucky to have found the right office fit for this WAHM. And as for my former no pants days…there are still weekends at home 😉
