As the novice mother that I am (kid under 1) I am far from being an expert parent, however back when I was still pregnant with Remy the hubby and I constantly made bold declarations about how we’d raise our future child. Now, I know that I still have plenty of years to go in this game we call parenting but I can already tell that our little lady will be a force to be reckoned with, and that those declarations were nothing more than nonsense made by two naïve adult-children.
Let’s review some of the proclamations I made pre-baby, shall we?
No Shoes No Service – I don’t like seeing children without their shoes on, it’s something that has bugged me since I was a child myself, so I promised myself at a young age that my future children would never walk around barefoot unless they were in our home. Well, the Great Creator blessed me with a child that is sure to be a hippy. She’s always trying to find ways to remove her socks and/or shoes. And without a doubt, she is successful every single time
The public meltdown – I’ve been witness to a child going completely nuclear in the middle of the Target isle and I sympathetically look at the parent and swiftly walk away. In the past, while I walked away I always made a mental note that my child will never throw a tantrum in public and that we will raise them to be well-behaved angels. Thankfully I haven’t experienced a meltdown first hand as of yet however I now understand that this isn’t really something you can avoid. It will happen and all I can do is patiently wait for when the moment hits. Don’t worry, I already have a plan: pretend to be the nanny.
The 5 second rule – pre-baby I’d see parents dust off pacifiers after they hit the ground and hand it back to their little ones and I would cringe in disgust, but if we’re being honest here, I’ve pulled that trick many times over. Once the pacifier hits the ground I quickly pick it up, look around for witnesses, and if no one is looking stick it in my mouth to zap the germs, and plop it back in Remy’s mouth. Yeah, I’m that mom. The pacifier is king in my home.
The Negotiation Tactic – I always promised myself that I would never be the parent that bribed my child to do something but I negotiate with my tiny human almost daily. Whether it’s to eat just one more spoonful of food or to stay in her crib for five more minutes, I find myself asking Remy to work with me as if she understands.
So to all the parents I previously judged during my pre-baby bliss, I truly apologize from the bottom of my heart. I understand that sometimes handing over your iPhone is the only way your tiny human will calm down or that sitting your child in front of the TV is the only way dinner will get done. I still don’t comprehend the parents that walk around with their children on tethers but to each their own, right? Don’t feel guilty if you have to resort to breaking one of your cardinal rules of parenting, just look at it as an opportunity to reflect and compromise. In parenting, even the best laid plans are thrown out the window and as parents we just have to accept that fact and continue on our way.
Doesn’t this post deserve a follow up? We’ll touch base in 18 years;)
Yep, I do most of these things daily as well 🙂
I totally agree! How you THINK you’re going to parent, and how you actually DO parent once the baby comes along are two totally different things. Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do to get through the day. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do!