I’m Not the Person I Wanted to Be

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I’ve had a huge realization throughout this quarantine time. Here it is: I’m definitely no where near where I thought I would be in life. 

Maybe you can relate. Maybe there is something that hasn’t turned out the way you planned. I really hope I’m not the only one who has come to the realization that I’m not in the place I thought I would be heading into 30. 

I’ve sat and tried to process how my parenting style, career, some relationships, and even my personality have morphed into something I don’t recognize. While it was totally sad at first, to realize I don’t even know how I ended up here, I have spent some time figuring out how I can be better and make the most of life.

I came up with a list 5 things to help me: 

  1. I’ve made progress. Regardless of where I am now, I’ve made SO much progress from where I was 10, 5 and even 1 year ago. I’m more confident in myself and my abilties. I have a close network of people I trust and support me. I’ve grown up and learned a lot. Even if I’m not where I thought I would be, I’m somewhere way better than where I’ve been.
  2. I can be grateful. I’m not where I thought I would be, but I’m grateful for where I am. I am healthy, happy and here. I have a WONDERFUL little family, and I am SO grateful for my kids. I can focus on what I DO have instead of what I don’t. 
  3. I can stop trying to figure it all out. I’m a planner, I like to know exactly how the next week, month, and year will go. We all know that having kids (and this year!) throws planning right out the window. I’ve learned to accept that fact that I don’t need to plan everything and to try and know where my life will go. 
  4. I can change my perspective. Instead of sitting around and thinking about how I’m not where I wanted to be, I can focus on where I am. I’m focusing on what IS, and the rest I can still make happen if I want it to. There is no timeline for life. I’m just trying to put my focus on my accomplishments rather than my failures. 
  5. I can trust the process. I’ve always (since probably high school) been a huge believer in “everything happens for a reason”. Rest assured, my close friends will probably tell you that I’ve annoyed them by using the phrase during a low-point in their life. However, I believe in it 100%. I trust that if I continue to do my best work, and do things to the highest of my abilities, I can still get to wherever I want to be. 
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Ashley Lessard
Ashley is Disney-Obsessed Momma to 2 adorable little ones (Charlotte & John) who are both in their toddler years. She has two fun and lovable rescue pups, and an amazing husband whom she first met in second grade. Together they all enjoy hiking and supporting small local businesses. In her free time Ashley is a basic mom who, like most, enjoys Target, coffee, and wine! She also enjoys traveling to Disneyland and eating Pineapple Dole Whip frequently. She loves eating all things sweet, and loves the rain! She is a HUGE fan of watching Disney movies and drinking iced coffee year round. It’s never too cold for iced coffee, seriously, she drinks it in the snow. Ashley’s perfect day (besides a day spent in Disneyland) would be snuggling on the couch watching a Disney movie with a great cup of iced coffee, and the door open to the rain outside!

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