Exhaustion, Patience, Joy and Love

Never in a million years did I think I would be a twin mom. Growing up, I always knew I wanted to be a mom. I thought it would be fun to have a couple of kids, a boy and a girl maybe. I wasn’t sure the exact number of kids I wanted, but I knew twins were never on my radar. After having a girl and a boy I thought life was going pretty well, I was happy with the kids I had and thought we would have one more kid at the most. When we found out I was pregnant again I was anxious to find out if it was a boy or girl. I will never forget the moment the ultrasound tech said that she saw two heads.

Wait what?

Did you say two heads, as in two babies? Yep, she confirmed, congratulations you’re having twins. I held it together as I walked to the car. As soon as I got to the car I was in full on tears. I don’t know if it was the shock, the excitement, the exhaustion or probably a mixture of it all. I was overwhelmed to say the least.

I had no idea how I was going to take care of twins, along with the two other kids I had, plus continue to work my full time job. In the months leading up to the twin’s birth, I tried to collect all the advice I could. I talked to friends who had twins, joined support groups and just tried to prepare myself mentally for what was to come. Some advice stuck, some things didn’t.

Photo credit: CC Shotz by Christy

My twins are 10 month now, and in their short life I have learned a few things. On the top of the list; be prepared to be exhausted, in every sense of the word. I find myself mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted more times than not.

Everyone said get them on the same schedule. Ideally that would be amazing, and my twins did great for a while, but then they decided that wasn’t for them anymore. One sleeps, the other is awake. One wants a bottle and the other could care less. They are constantly keeping me guessing and I have lost all sense of time and keeping track. But luckily, they let me know when they need something. I just pay attention to their cues and we go with the flow. That is what’s working best for us now.

I also learned that if I had any chance of leaving the house on a regular basis we better start early. So I did. I took all four of my kids out almost as soon as I could. We quickly got into a routine, my older kids learned how to help and we learned how long we could be out before the babies had a total breakdown. Not every trip is successful, but because they are now used to it, I don’t completely dread leaving the house.

Lastly, I realized really early to just expect everything I did to take at least twice the amount of time, if not more. I learned patience. I don’t know why, but when people see twins, they act as if you are a celebrity. No matter where we go we get stopped at least 2 or 3 times with people asking, “Are they Twins?”, “Boy/Girl?”, “No way, you are so lucky.”, or my favorite, “Man you have your hands full.” We are seriously like a circus act. Patience. Every twin or multiples mom needs to have patience. No trip can be simple and fast, even if you try to avoid contact and keep your head down. Someone will stop you.

Although my journey has been short so far, this experience has been exhausting and so rewarding. I wouldn’t change it for the world. I look forward to many more stops at the store, and a life full of more exhaustion, patience, joy and love than I ever thought possible.